1. He cannot afford the books he just bought to help him serve you better. download (2)
  2. He has worked over five weeks in a row without a day off several times this year and the only one who knows are his wife and kids.
  3. Yes he probably knows all the gossip about you (though he will say he has heard nothing)  and loves you like family anyway.
  4. He is always on call. If he has been a pastor for 5 years he has been on call over 40,000 hours.
  5. His children, and wife hate the phone.
  6. He has probably visited or received help from the foodbank this year.
  7. He can’t sleep without some kind of medication.
  8. He is probably on or has been on some kind of anti depressant.
  9. He is probably not telling the truth about certain personal theological changes because he’s afraid you will fire him.
  10. He and his wife cannot afford childcare and a date at the same time. So they have probably not been alone together for months.
  11. He is the loneliest person in the church no matter how many friends he has. He can only allow certain people to become very close to him and if he’s smart it’s not a person in the congregation.
  12. He wants to hide after every sermon.
  13. His hardest day is Monday (most pastor’s day off)
  14. He has performed many weddings, funerals for free and counseling sessions for free. Most of the time its the wealthy and middle class families that don’t pay or pay very little.
  15. He wears the same clothes all the time for several years because he cannot afford new ones.
  16. His most feared question is “hey what are you doing tomorrow? “
  17. He loves to hear about your trip to Hawaii unless his wife is around.
  18. If he seems defensive a lot he is probably being attacked a lot.
  19. He is human and wrestles with how to reconcile his humanity with your expectations.
  20. He knows that most marriage counseling will end in the couple leaving the church.
  21. His kids have never heard dad say “maybe tomorrow ” to you like he has said it to them hundreds of times.

I know these dont apply to every pastor but i am interested in what you If you are or were a pastor, pastor’s kid or pastor’s spouse what would you add to this list?

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